So I write

The other day my mom found a piece of paper from the yonder years... A time when we didn't have blogs...a time when a wall meant that... A wall. And a time when you wrote your thoughts with a pen on a piece of paper and didn't have 140 characters limit.

So she found my notes on the very first concert I attended. A Michael Jackson concert. As a teenager that was by far the coolest thing I had ever done. And I had lots of fun doing it. As an adult I'm now embarrassed at the thought of my mom reading the words of a squealing  teenage boy.

So I mentioned this to s, and that i used to write a lot like this as a kid and now I'm concerned what else my mom could find. Knowing me, the only concern s had was, why wasn't I writing more frequently now.

It's not like i write award winning essays, this is really just a diary, and I don't really know why I do get this urge to write stuff. I can still get super excited with new stationery. 

So anyways, maybe this is my wake up call, and I might start blogging more.

Currently humming the songs of yjhd in my head. Gnight!

If you run

There is a state of life we all enjoy to be in. Current-state.. Only if nothing bad is happening. When something's don't go your way, you wish rather pine for that current-state. But that Current-state is such a horrible poison, it's such an addictive drug, that it numbs all your senses.

In that Current-state we give in, drop down our fences, start assuming and worse forget to move on. I saw the kid president speech by the soul pancake group and it reminded me the words of Steve Jobs and pretty much the sentiment of every visionary on earth.

"I think if you do something and it turns out pretty good, then you should go do something else wonderful, not dwell on it for too long. Just figure out what's next."

This applies to every aspect of life.

S is out of town and that brought me out of my current-state... The question is, what will I do till she gets back?

Listening to "if you run" - boxer rebellion

God

When it comes to God. I dont really know what my relationship with him is. I dont believe my fate should be controlled by anything or anybody. But yet I do believe in luck. How can I believe in a random notion as luck and yet question the existence of a Deity? Luck is about being at the right place and the right time. But whats to say that God plans these Right place Right Times for people? I know I cant seriously ever discuss my religious views with anyone. Ill probably joke it off, Ill probably shrug it off or just go through the whole conversation without meaning it at all. 

God is rightfully in everything we do. God is in every awake moment of your life and every dream. God is in you, your consciousness, your awareness to differentiate Right/Wrong. There is no wrong, if you dont believe in it. Life is a series of decisions. You live your choices. And you guide your decisions with the inner voice of God. Your own voice. Your own consciousness.

There are three songs that I really like. And they feel right when I think of God. 

The first is Akheer by Juggy D. 

Akheer The last or The end

Jadon sir to chath hi lit jaaye
When the roof comes off your head
Badhal bijli sit jaye
Clouds and lightning come down
Likihya na hi mit jaaye
Everything that is written gets erased
Dharthi chadh jaye tha
Even the world leaves your side
Phir Iko kaam tu kare pyariya
Then do only one thing my love
Le le usda naam
Remember God's name

Jado duniya rabh hi ban jaaye
When your world becomes one with God
Panni aag hi ban jaaye
When your eyes fill with tears
Ko sawab hi ban jaaye
When everyone becomes a stranger
Na abu ranee na ma
Neither your father or mother are there
Phir Iko kaam tu kare pyariya
Then do only one thing my love
Le le usda naam
Remember God's name

Jado buliya ma naya vey
Until you say your mom's name she wont come
Haath joyriya mai nai ma nai vey
Until you pray your hands to God,
he wont listen
Sidhamkar sham hi nai aave
Bulan na banere kat ka
Phir Iko kaam tu kare pyariya
Then do only one thing my love
Le le usda naam
Remember God's name

Jado lokhan le tu maran turay
When you are ready to die for other people
Sabhan banaye karan turay
Like a soap you are washing other's sins
Has Has suni chan turay
People sit and laugh at you
Sah rahe na jaayan
There is neither breath nor life in you
Phir Iko kaam tu kare pyariya
Then do only one thing my love
Le le usda naam
Remember God's name...

The Second Song is Ith Naheen by Sanam Marvi from Coke Studio Sessions Season 4.

Title: Ith Naheen If Not Right Here
Language: Urdu, Siraiki
Poet: Sachal Sarmast (d. 1829)

tu mila bhi hai tu juda bhi hai
You are merged, You are also apart
tera kya kahna
You defy description!
tu sanam bhi hai tu khuda bhi hai
You are the idol. You are also God
tera kya kahna
You defy description!
kya kahna
defy description!
ith naheen te kith naheen
if not right here, then nowhere
ith naheen te kith naheen
if not right here, then nowhere
eeho kaun pya bolainda
who is this who is speaking
bolainda
is speaking
bolainda
is speaking
ith naheen te kith naheen
if not right here, then nowhere
kanjari waali soorat ban ke
assuming the appearance of a dancing girl
sachal naam saḍenda
“Sachal, the Truthful’ is he proclaimed as
he is proclaimed as “(Sachal) the Truthful’
saḍenda
proclaimed as
saḍenda
proclaimed as
ith naheen to kith naheen
if not right here, then nowhere

And the third song is Aik Alif by Saieen Zohar and Noori

Parh parh ilm te faazil hoya
You read to become all knowledgable
Te kaday apnay aap nu parhya ee na
But you never read yourself
Bhaj bhaj warna ay mandir maseeti
You run to enter your mosques and temples
Te kaday mann apnay wich warya ee na
But you never entered your own heart

Larna ay roz shaitaan de naal
Everyday you fight Satan
Te kadi nafs apnay naal larya ee na
But you never fight your own Ego
Bulleh Shah asmaani ud-deya pharonda ay
Bulleh Shah you try grabbing that which is in the sky
Te jera ghar betha unoon pharya ee na
But you never get hold of what sits inside yourself

Bas kareen o yaar
Stop it all my friend
Ilm-oun bas kareen o yaar
stop seeking all this knowledge my friend
Ik Alif teray darkaar
Only an Alif is what you need
Bas kareen o yaar
stop it all my friend
Ilm-oun bas kareen o yaar…
Stop seeking all this knowledge my friend

Allah Sayyaan Allah Sayyaan
God is Greatness, God is All
Nee main jaanaa Jogi de naal
I shall follow the Jogi {ascetic/Sufi}

Jo naa jaane, Haqq ki taaqat
those who deny the strength of Truth
Rab naa devey us ko Himmat
God does not give them courage
Hum Mann ke darya mein doobey
We have drowned in the river of Self
Kaisi nayya? Kya manjhdhaar…
the boat and the flowing waters do not matter

Bas kareen o yaar
stop it all my friend
Ilm-oun bas kareen o yaar
stop seeking all this knowledge my friend
Allah Sayyaan Allah Sayyaan
God is Greatness, God is All

And so we live

Its a Sunday night againAnd I find myself listening to some music and just whiling time on the internet. So I decided to Post something. And as my typical posts have been, it's about the weekend, it's about life and it's about music. Been a year since s and I are living a long distance relationship, not a small long distance nut a rather long long one . East coast west coast , one red eye flight apart! And all this while I just have learnt to appreciate S more n more for all that she is in my life! Met up some old friends today and while just catching up we came to the conclusion that we both would just dread getting back to the game! Lol! Not that we stand a chance, not that we would even think of it, but if faced with that situation we wouldnt last a bit! Life has its bit of irony saved for me always. We are getting some really great news for people so dear to us, and here we are stuck between a soup and curry! But this too shall pass! With patience and perseverance! Lol somewhere in my school anthem were those two words, now I know the meaning of em. Food... I have been thankful to god to bring me to such a city where there's just an abundance of variety of cuisines. Not to mention the money to be able to buy that food :) so thank you god. For that vada pav restaurant between my work and home and thank you god for that late night Pakistani restaurant that serves a great Biryani and achari chicken! Today I was so stuffed I couldn't even have dinner.... But the afternoon was really special! With friends and food and wine and desserts! And coffees! Music... So lately I'm listening to a motley crew of music bands, the killers, Mumford and sons, band of horses, Paulo nutini, kings of Leon, Coldplay, onerepublic and Jason mraz. And then there's skrillex, the glitch mob and ukf. So yeah pretty bizarre spectrum but overall entertaining. Took a hike and went to a very beautiful place. Took tonnes of pictures, except my memory card was corrupted. Lost all my pics :( cest la vie... End of a very relaxing weekend. Back to the grind

Ramblings.

Its been a year since S and I have been in a long distance relationship. This is the 3rd time we are in an LDR again.  Every new one seems harder than the last one. God, I dont want any more long distance relationships. One thing the LDR does is gives me time to watch a lot of online videos and listen to any music at any time I want.

My music taste is all over the board. I started off last year listening to Coke Studios Pakistan (Way better than the piece of crap they put up in India). Current playlist is a bunch of Dido hits, eminems stan and landing in london. Talk about variety eh?

Talking about videos, I saw this presentation by Bret Victor, an ex Apple UI designer, a brilliant person. And I think his presentation was brilliant! more about Bret at www.worrydream.com

http://vimeo.com/36579366

Btw: Last year I got to see Coldplay up close. This year I get to attend their concert.

and The IRON MAIDEN! hell yeah! 30+ but finally seeing my dream materialize.

End of the weekend. Back to the grind.

The year 2011

Partied the night into 2011. Cold chilly snowy winter. Jan 11th saw the craziest snowfall it could in Charlotte. Also gave me a cute angel of a niece. Went to India for a month, saw a sisters wedding. Came back to the craziest voicemail inbox with 7 interview calls from all various companies and the last that topped it all off. Crazy three months following that saw me move to my dream company. Summer Vacation to ATL n Disney with another niece. CLT->SFO. SFO->CLT->SFO was how the rest of the year went. Turned a leaf from being a windows user to a mac. Extended re-union with school buddies. One's a homie now! Got to play with another cute infant for a while. Saw a couple more cute kids dropped by the stork who was working overtime from late 2010. TV didn't quite cut it in early 2010. Explored the West Coast. Los Angeles, Las Vegas, Grand Canyon, San Francisco yeah! Drove like crazy. 1700 miles. 1 traffic light violation. expensive. Beverly hills Grrr. SFO->CLT for Christmas Drove again. 1900 miles. no ticket! Miami/Key West Florida Yay! Partied the night crunk into 2012. In retrospect 2011: -Moved -East Coast/West Coast -Long Distance -Lots of Parties -Lots of babies! not in that order thankfully :) -Lots of driving 2 tickets!:( 5800 miles 3 trips And now here I am listening to some Kings of Leon "The End" (coincidentally!!!)

Kit-Kat

Umm .. love the kit-kat commercial which shows people snap a bar and break it into 2 and take a bite with the sounds of all three acts.

On other thoughts. started watching Man vs. Food... awesome series. that guy can kill himself eating so much food. but i love the food they show. and surprisingly it makes me full.

Netflix rocks. Grooveshark rocks. Best buy rocks. Black Friday does not.

Oh btw s, I doubt that you will read this. but in case you had, you would have know you were getting a surprise tomorrow.

u2 360

So, S n I were finally able to accomplish one of my dreams :) (grinning from ear to ear). Yesss!! I went to a U2 concert. A real live U2 Concert!!!!

Bono and Edge and Mullen Jr and Adam Clayton are just awesome entertainers!!! I mean the whole show was just so awesome! They had a central screen that was just awesome! And Bono was just awesome.

So there you go. I was at the U2 360 ° concert at Raleigh. And it was awesome.

Whoa... 2 posts in a row

So, Im back! Today is Monday, its also feast day at home. S goes tomorrow morning, so we cook for 3 days. Until last semester, it was food cooked for 5 days, now its just 3 days.

We cooked.. shrimp in hot curry, some awesome mozzarella sticks, some crab cakes, pulao rice and some curd curry. Wow. I just had a Guinness with mozzarella sticks. Watching House. S was really excited about House but does not like the new house in the asylum.

Next on my list of goals:

-Bungee Jumping

-Para trooping

-Hosting a Podcast on Indian Songs

-Get my certification

-Support a good cause and propagate it.

-Get back to studying English. (I really think English is an awesome language, it has the complexities you need, its universal, its easy and its highly adaptable)

More to come.

Yalo

So... Its been a crazy long time since I had any updates. Rather since I wrote something. Well abot a month and a half ago, I had my in-laws visiting me for about 2 months. I guess I wrote something about them. And if not, A-town, take note, you are officially on my not-so-cool-cities list. I had a break in.. my poor baby of a car had a break-in...:(. Right I cant let go off it that easily.

Then right after this was done, we started looking out for used cars for S. That was a horrible experience. Cash for Clunkers.. schmunkers... all those lucky dogs on the streets with horrible cars were able to get the governments cash for new cars. What that did to the industry was a catastrophic nightmare. The sharks at the dealers were eying those lucky dogs. People like me n S who were out there trying to get a great deal on a used car, which on a normal business platform was not a big deal, were left high and dry.. literally .. dry.. (at this one dealer were all --can you believe it... ALL salesmen were busy dealing with customers for new cars!! .. no one could even offer us water after we checked out cars out in their lot under scorching heat of the oh so pretty sun). Boy do I digress. But seriously, any person, who had the fortune of visiting that car dealer on that day, would've left the place thinking: "uh .. what recession?".

Anyways, back to the reason why I've been so busy, now as if the car wasnt such a big issue, our stupid apartment community had to hike the rate on us. Her words "This place is oh-so-effing charming that you will have to cough up the additional amount I say or else leave!". So then the second mission we had was to find an apartment that we like, and that fits our budget. So, car and Apartment, no big deal. We kinda nailed it on the last weekend that we had available. But it was a harrowing experience.

So now finally after a long long time I have some free time in front of a pc and actually got the willpower to post something. I mean there are countless posts that are saved as drafts... occasionally I have the urge to write about something and then when I do start to write, the passion just fizzles. The point looks moot. The effort seems wasted. The post looks ... just that... a post. And it is, rightfully so, meant to be just that, a post. Its not that the world cares about what I feel about the shenanigans of the INC and Mr. Tharoor. Or for that matter, Obama's health care plan. Boy a couple of sentences back that was a whole load of commas for nothing.

So here goes... my list of what Ive been upto:

Movies watched: District 9, Inglorious Basterds, The "umpteenth" final destination, Julie and Julia, He's just not that into you, Sunshine Cleaning, Fast and Furious 4th, GI Joe, Transformers 2, Haunting in Connecticut, Kaminey and some more that I dont even remember.

Books read: Zilch... although I have bought "The Hobbit" I plan to start off with this one and then move on to the LOTR series, that will definitely buy me some time.

Drinks Had: Miller Lite, Guinness on the Draft, Blue Mojito, Awesome Mango and Berry Flavored Iced Tea at the Ruby Tuesday, Tequila, Jack and Coke, Baileys, Heineken.

Life pretty much goes on. Had some great weekends with some friends.

Oh btw, Id be fulfilling one of my dreams. Im going to U2's concert!!! Looking fwd to Oct 3rd.

The "un"Holy Wars

Many a thing has been said about the recent terrorist attacks in Mumbai. Many a things have been done after that. People have reacted to it in the best possible manner they deemed. Some came out with profanity, some came out with fear and while others including me expressed anger. 

S kept on reminding, we are not there, what right do we have to say anything? I kept on saying, it doesn't matter where I am, there are some things that are so wrong at the core root that they need to be addressed.

What do I mean by wrong to the core? Fight over religion. That is wrong. I don't think any religion preaches violence. No religion can do that, its the wrong misguided uninformed interpretation that is wrong. This misinterpretation of religion is abused by some and absolved by some. This is wrong.There are a lot of things that are correlated to this but I dont think I need to delve into something thats being anlyzed a million ways already. There is no right analysis to why this happened.

But I will say my final two words and keep it simple. If you remove discrimination based on race, sex, caste, religion, color, ethnicity, physical attributes, diseases and all other man made measuring tools and the person right besides you is nothing a but a human being, Just the same as you, a living breathing human being. So respect them the same way you would respect yourself and life can move on.

Seinfeld

So what do you do when you get your hour back? So I dig up my collection of Seinfeld and watch a couple of episodes. Its always a great way to relax. soothing .. relaxing .. sleeping .. yah .. nothing like the weekend.

Ayo....

So a few months back while checking my gmail ... I finally started paying attention to the lil ticker bar on the top in your inbox that provides links based off of what you want to see and the context in your email... 

A long time back people were scared that someone or some software can scan your private emails and then use them best against you... that seems to be a note of the past now....

Back to the main topic, the lil ticker bar, I know google has a word for it, aha .. Web Clip. This thing provides some light entertainment to your mail. I like to see what the word of the day is or like to see what wired.com or engadget.com write... (those sites were/are my favorite since the iphone 3g days). 

But today my topic aint about the Webclip bar solely. Its about what I feel is happening around me.... First the hype about the Iphone 3g... its a pretty cool gadget I must say.. :D... ok but the real point is.. I am writing this blog using a chrome browser and its a pain to use the chrome browser for blogger.com. Can you believe it? Googles browser does not work fine for its own products.... The font selector never works, you gotta highlight the text and then change the font.... no thats not the point of this post as well...

Its about what is happening around us.. I know I said this before as well... Heres whats happening... theres hype about google chrome, we jump right in, theres hype about Apple and their iphones and we jump right in ... we as a consumer buy in to anything and everything thats out there to get us... does it improve our life? well to some extent yes... but was it needed??? and to that question you may have various answers....

When me n S go out shopping Im the one that usually caves in easily .. Im the one that is the ideal retailers dream customer.. the credit card company's dream cow.. but I have my own self protecting device... i ask myself the question do I absolutely need the stuff right away? if the answer... is no .. which it mostly is .. then i put it on my list of things to buy the next time I visit the store .. and you know what? next time around .. I dont even feel the urge to buy that stuff.. If i do .. then I would buy it .. but not otherwise.... 

Thats my rambling for the day .. my next serious question is .. is continuing this post further on really worth giving up on my sleep?

Saturday

Its been quite some time since I am actually at home watching the tv and just relaxing. Since the time I moved to Charlotte, each weekend has been a fun filled crazy weekend with a lot to do. Either its been us at the friends or the friends over at us. And the last two months have been even more fun. My Ma is here with us...so its kinda like payback time :D...

Remember how as children we hate so many decisions our parents make. Be it the pink pant that they think fits perfectly great on you or the ban on cricket or just the scolding and abolishment of anything we thought was cool... well.. now that she is here.... everything I do seems to be just fine.. she even defends me when the wifey says something about something that I shouldnt have anyways done in the first place.

Things kind of take a full circle hyperbolic round turn ....and it always amuses me. Its just something that you cant control when it happens but after its done its stuff you just seem to be perfectly all right with it. The soaring gas prices, inflation, economy concerns...I was kind of really shaken at the way things were going initially, but it doesnt seem to bother the rest of our generation. I mean at the rate we are going, is it really worth bringing in another generation? What are we giving them? But then the other thought came to mind. The answer. Science, we dont ever give up do we? We develop invisible shields, sound shields, we would soon develop a more efficient way to generate energy. Necessity breeds Innovation. This has always been the mantra of Mankind and Life on Earth and it will prove itself this time again.

I thought about it myself? So what do we do right now? Burn coal, create steam, get turbines whirring, let the magnets do their stuff to the coils of copper and lo! electircity. Nuclear? Same concept, burn atoms (metamorphically) create steam, blah blah... ok ok... the latest thing going around... the talk of the town... Gas/Petrol/Oil... burn oil, create pressure, get pistons whirring, let the gears do their stuff and lo! transportation / production / irrigation / construction... and all other things that depend on the great thermal cycle of whats called as the petrol engine. Whats the key point to all of this? Efficiency? we havent been producing energy efficiently. So theres our first necessity.. increase efficiency... what next? What about all the heat we produce? we waste it .. what happens when we waste it... it goes in the atmosphere... heats the earth and sits there.... maybe someone will develop a machine that harnesses heat energy to create electricity.. soon enough we may not need air conditioners...

Well .. when I could think of all such things.. then I think .. some scientist out there must be definitely on his way to these things.. the earth would be saved once again by science..tantanaaaaaa

Alright... enough of ramblings....back to just enjoying the plain old saturday....

Braves

What does it feel like being brave?

Well I am not sure if I have had that moment in life when I can definitively say I was brave to do this, or I was the bravest amongst the lot to have done this....

I saw two visions of Braveness in a spam of 10 minutes yesterday in the most unsuspecting, unexpected forms of all. The first vision, all though led by vanity, was a cool moment whereas the second one was slightly disheartening and demanded to question the superior authority of its judgment.

As I waited outside Claire's yesterday while my Ma and Wife were shopping for earrings... honestly how long should that take?... long enough for me to be able see these two events.

One girl maybe 3 years or smaller than that, asked for her ears to be pierced. This may not seem an event to be classified as brave, but this little lady had an audience of her ma, brother, dad, uncle, aunt, 1 awed indian husband of a lady who was showing her ma in law different earring designs... and the two ladies assisting with the piercing. She was all prepared and told about the procedure and she was strong with a smile and gave the go ahead. I shuddered and had goose bumps as I saw the two sales people one on each side punch holes in those little ears. The moment they clicked the little girl was shocked and slightly jerked but then again she just stared as if nothing happened. I thought the shock would settle in, in about 5 - 10 mins and she would start crying .. wailing rather...but she was just fine.... That confidence in a small kid to me was so brave....

At that same moment as she walked out with her family...I decided that the store had nothing interesting for me and walked out of the store and there I saw the second child. On the ramp in the center of the walkway I saw this kid pushing himself fast on a wheelchair. His Dad was right behind him and didnt even thought of pushing him up the ramp. The kid didnt even ask his dad to be pushed. They both were just fine and walked by in the crowd as if nothing ever happened.

That was the second brave thing I saw. These two sights may not be that significant or important in someones life, but to me there was the proof that life continues...

Trying to... trying to...

Been trying to and wanting to write, but times one element thats been eluding me to the core. Not that I dont have time at all, but writing comes out of a chain of thoughts, it needs to be followed and noted down. Just havent been getting that kind of a continuity for a long time. Even to finish a book, which ideally would have taken me a couple of days, I had to take considerable time and effort and sometimes even disappoint S so much so that I can capture the essence of that particular twist in the tale.

Wish I had a 48 hour day. Wish I could be fast at things to work out everything and yet get me the time to catch up on me.

Had a nice weekend, friends over, did some trail walking, some partying, some dinning, some fun. Lets see what happens next.

My sympathies to the people who had their dreams, their wish come true moments, their happiness and joys pinned on the one little aspect called visa, many were sure it was going to be a piece of cake, but not anymore. Wish you guys the best of luck...